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To the one who I should’ve married..

It was the summer of 2007, and I was relaxing in my trailer in Iraq. I’d been deployed for nearly a year.. and I couldn’t help but feel homesick and think of my loved ones.

So late at night, and I had to go to bed. I wished that I had someone to be there with me so badly. I laid down in my bed, and began to drift into sleep. As I relaxed, I meditated on making love to you, Tiera.

*light classical music turns on in the background*

Slipping into the silence, releasing my inner essence,
Connecting with your presence, fleeting pleasure yet it’s precious.
Liquid soulful treasure, pulsing growing pleasure,
Leaving no defensive measure, against insatiable sexual pressure.
I close my eyes and open yours, you stroke my cheek and open the doors,
Forgetting fantasy our hearts implore, creating reality out of nothing.. and more.

Liquid spirit pouring out, into the night and beyond the clouds,
To feel your kiss upon my mouth, I melt and forget what it’s all about.

I worship the endless satisfaction, the releasing of my body to your actions,
My greatest thrill is your reactions, to make you cum is my ultimate passion.

Releasing my spirit into your trust, purest waves of love and lust,
Flow between the two of us, as I melt into your every touch.

The faster we go the more I see your eyes, though mine are closed I feel it burning deeper in my mind,
As our hearts extend out into the night, I am yours and you are mine.

Control of yourself you’ve released to me, yet my own will i’ve granted thee,
Forgetting ourselves so passionately, fills us with uncharted sexuality.
Our soul collapses within the cloud, of purest passion that we’ve found,
Spirits lifted high above the ground, moaning so softly to the feelings so loud.

I forget the reasons I left you, our spirits connected so whole and true,
For now at least I know the truth, you’re in love with me and I with you.


I copied this from some canadian website.. I hope that this will get used by many people in the future:

Medical uses of Marijuana

Cannabis Properties
What are the medical uses of marijuana, and is there any evidence to support its use?
What are the effects of marijuana?
What forms does marijuana come in?
Is marijuana addictive?

I wish for all of medical users in Canada to be more informed, and so better able to make intelligent decisions regarding the use of medical marijuana.

Now, here’s a bit of boring, but very important information regarding the weed you’re interested in smoking or eating. You should always find out as much about something you’re going to put into your body as you can, before you try it.

THC (Tetrahydrocannabinol) is the psychoactive component present in Cannabis. In other words it’s the component in Marijuana that gives you the pleasant “high” feeling. But it doesn’t work alone to produce that feeling. There are a cocktail of chemical components found in Cannabis.

Recent research has proved THC to be medically useful. CBN is a non-psychoactive agent, and is the component that makes the weed smell and taste so nice after it’s harvested and cured properly. It can also cause drowsiness and other similarly unwanted, but mild, side-affects.

Different medical Marijuana strains help different types of medical conditions. Some of the additional chemical components found in medical Marijuana are: Cannabigerol (CBG), cannabichromene (CBC), cannabidiol (CBD), delta-8-THC, cannabicyclol (CBL), cannabinol (CBN), cannabitriol (CBT), cannabavarin (THCU). All are known to have psychoactive and pharmacological effects.

Animal testing has shown that CBN and THC reduce IOP (intraocular pressure), but CBD does not. CBD has, however, been found to have anxiolytic and antipsychotic effects. Also, unlike THC, CBD alone is not effective in treating pain. Though it does act as a sedative and can relieve muscle spasms. Medical studies also show CBD can improve sleep. CBD is also reported to be effective for treatment of dystopias, Huntington’s disease, Parkinson’s disease, and neuropathic conditions.

The most desirable strains for medical marijuana use are ones that have been genetically developed by designated medical marijuana grower experts to have an extremely low CBN concentration while maintaining an available range of THC concentrates.

Cannabis Properties

Cannabis has been claimed to help with a large number of wide-ranging symptoms. However, research has concluded three major properties which are medically useful. Cannabis is:

an analgesic (relieves pain)
an anti-emetic (relieves nausea and vomiting)
an appetite stimulant (induces hunger)

A very large and growing community of people with medical complaints such as severe chronic pain use Cannabis for medicinal purposes without the after-affects and damage associated with many of today’s commonly-prescribed medications.

Typically, medical Cannabis use is practised by AIDS and MS patients, but it is certainly not limited to just these conditions. THC is also one of the safest active substances known to man, and has a wide variety of therapeutic applications including, but certainly not limited to:

Reduction of muscle spasms.
Relief from chronic pain.
Relief from nausea and increase of appetite.

What are the medical uses of marijuana, and is there any evidence to support its use?

AIDS. Medical Marijuana can reduce the nausea, vomiting, and loss of appetite caused by the ailment itself and by various AIDS medications.

Glaucoma. Medical Marijuana can reduce interlobular pressure, thereby alleviating the pain, and slowing — and sometimes stopping — the progress of the condition. Glaucoma is the leading cause of blindness in the United States. It damages vision by increasing eye pressure over time.

Cancer. Medical Marijuana can stimulate the appetite and alleviate nausea and vomiting, which are common side effects of chemotherapy treatment.

Multiple Sclerosis. Medical Marijuana can limit the muscle pain and spasticity caused by the disease, as well as relieving tremor and unsteadiness of gait. Multiple sclerosis is the leading cause of neurological disability among young and middle-aged adults in the United States.

Epilepsy. Medical Marijuana can prevent epileptic seizures in some patients.

Chronic Pain. Medical Marijuana can alleviate the chronic, often debilitating pain caused by myriad disorders and injuries.

Many patients also report that Marijuana is useful for treating arthritis, migraine, menstrual cramps, alcohol and opiate addiction, depression and other debilitating mood disorders.

Nearly all medicines have toxic, potentially lethal effects. Medical Marijuana is not such a substance.

There is not a single record in the extensive medical literature describing a proven, documented, cannabis-induced fatality. Simply stated, researchers have been unable to give animals enough Marijuana to induce death.

In practical terms, Medical Marijuana cannot induce a lethal response as a result of drug-related toxicity. In strict medical terms, Marijuana is far safer than many foods we commonly consume. Marijuana, in its natural form, is one of the safest therapeutically-active substances known to man.

What are the effects of marijuana?

Marijuana may produce the following effects (note that the effects listed below are not experienced by everyone who uses marijuana, and some people may experience side effects other than those listed):

psychological and cognitive effects such as euphoria (commonly referred to as a “high”), dysphoria (a “low”), anxiety, personality changes, hallucinations, misperceptions, sedation, and memory impairment
fidgeting, muscle twitching, and general weakness
pain relief
suppression of nausea
increase in appetite
tolerance (with long-term use) – this seems to develop with most of the behavioural effects, including the “high”
increase in heart rate (with short-term use)
decrease in heart rate (with long-term use)
decrease in blood pressure (because of widened blood vessels; it is this effect that causes red eyes)
increase in breathing (at low doses)
expansion of airway and coughing – tolerance develops to these effects
smoked-related lung damage (with long-term use)
impairment of the body’s ability to fight bacterial infections (with long-term use)
men: hormonal imbalances and decrease in sperm count and mobility (with long-term use; tolerance may develop to these effects)
women: hormonal imbalances and suppression of ovulation (with long-term use)

What are the medical uses of marijuana, and is there any evidence to support its use?

Many consider smoked Medical Marijuana to have anti-nausea benefits, but there is no evidence to support claims that marijuana is as good as or better than existing anti-nausea medications.

The capsule form of cannabis (dronabinol) is used to treat chemotherapy-induced nausea and to stimulate a person’s appetite in cases of AIDS-related weight loss. It has been shown to significantly increase appetite, but it also causes undesirable side effects such as dizziness and confusion. A major concern associated with its use by those with AIDS or cancer is the risk of increased difficulty in fighting infections.

A few published studies suggest that smoking marijuana helps people with multiple sclerosis as well as those with spinal cord injuries to relieve their symptoms.

Dronabinol was found to provide significant pain relief but it can cause drowsiness and mental clouding.

The high intraocular pressure (pressure inside the eye) that occurs with glaucoma can be reduced by marijuana use (taken in capsule form, or smoked); this is supported by a few reports from treatment of glaucoma patients.

Marijuana has also been considered for the treatment of many psychiatric disorders such as depression, sleep disorders, and Alzheimer’s disease, but no evidence exists to prove its effectiveness in these areas.

What forms does marijuana come in?

inhalation (smoked)
oral (capsules)
rectal (suppositories)

Is marijuana addictive?

It may be. It’s important to know that inappropriate use of marijuana can lead to physical dependence and addiction.
Physical dependence means that when a person stops using the substance, they develop withdrawal symptoms. Dependence has been produced in experimental studies following a prolonged intake of high doses of marijuana.

Withdrawal symptoms include disturbed sleep, decreased appetite, restlessness, irritability, and sweating. Physical dependence is not the same as addiction.

Addiction is a psychological need for the drug that leads to cravings, inability to control drug use, and an uncontrollable need to use the drug despite the harm it may cause. Whether or not someone becomes addicted to marijuana will depend on a variety of factors, such as genetics.”

TL;DR: Marijuana has medical uses.

the little things spreading out along the waves of time. The most important thing in all of this is to record the intent behind why it is that I record myself. You see, it’s difficult to sit down and type all kinds of thoughts continuously and seamlessly like it comes up in my mind. You see I can imagine countless universes and worlds, times and parallel universes, dimensions and that perhaps would not even be able to exist in real life. Maybe if one were to believe these parallel universes and whatnot, i could create stories and books. I mean, imagine creating something that somebody could get completely lost in, seamlessly, as if they were existing in their own book. That is what every single book is, and perhaps that is what is at the heart of madness in some situations.. If it’s not developed in an individual, if they’re not capable of sitting down and taking the time to sit down and relax and write and think and create, continuosly.. then maybe there would be more books, more inventions, more great ideas!! So then, record that that is my intent.. to sit down and write a book, by typing the words that i’m speaking, by transcribing my own babbling thoughts. Future me will sit down and stop and put the earbuds in my ears, and i will sit down and write the thoughts that i had in the past. I’m multitasking you see. I’m doing a project with future me. If there’s something you’ve got going on and you’re doing, and you’re thinking to yourself, “hey later on, i should do this that or the other thing.. ” all you have to do is travel through time!! blows the mind almost. all you have to do is just access the hidden dimensions that rest within the various different layers of multidimensionality that exist throughout your being. You see, because we are all energy, nothing more, vibrating along waves of time that exist as a multi-universal adapting organism. You see because I reverberate along closer to 26-30 dimensionalities above and beyond me. That is the key. To sit there.. not to sit there at all!!  but to allow yourself to evolve and mix in the chaotic froth of all the things that are combined and to be able to just step in and out of a doorway, a pathway, a simple door that you have to open before your mind. A door to the multi-dimensionality. To resurrect yourself along a different universe time.. universes that inhibit, universes that create. Universities that create men..


A state of being to a universe

get off of my sandwich creamy moo moo.!! That’s bread. That’s peanut butter. I wonder if i can hear him licking in the recording. It’s at 5:13. I’ll just have to remember that if i want to hear creamy moo moo recording.. if i want to hear creamy moo moo licking, i just have to go to 5 13 in the track D.

That’s the thing, is that as you go on throughout the day, the mind entertains itself with little little stories, little ideas, little thoughts, little dreams, in a way.. that is daydreaming!! it is beautiful, is it not, to sit down and daydream and create something truly… unique. something completely absorbed in a whole universe of it’s own. A possibility. A possibility. That is beautiful. It has the thing that it is beneath.

I could think all kinds of funny things, things that could make me laugh, things that could make me say, “omg, that is brilliant!” over and over.. but the key missing factor is that I do not write down everything that I think and everything that I say. So why not write down more of what you think and what you say.

So I say hello to you reader. Welcome to my story. Here you are. Some individual that I will probably never meet.


Instead of there being a long pause, I let out a handshake. I reach my hand out to you, and I welcome you to my song. You see, because all that we are, is a reverberation along the universes intermixing being. I can step out of the shadows through a portal, a worm hole across time.. and I can extend my hand and say “hello, my name’s ben. I’ve been waiting for you for quite some time. I’ve traveled 31 years now, and i’ve just traveled through time to say hello to you. you may be in the year 2130, you may be in the year 2046, you may be in the year 2014, the year after i wrote it down and handed it to the publisher.  You may be some of the first to read anything that I have ever written, and you have no idea who I am. Hello. You may be somebody who has heard of me. And resurrect the good dreams and the bad dreams will never become.

I am going off on a tangent. I was just thinking about a past time that I had, discussing the possibilities of the universe with another individual on the internet. We were just sitting there chatting on a chat room on omegle, and i said to myself what this person said is brilliant!! because, it harnesses a thoughtwave,  that is fasinating..


little things that are daydreams. Daydreaming is beautiful, is it not?

mind of the scientist, that’s what i’ve always been trained to be.. a little child being trained to think creatively and imaginatively, with complex resolutions to a problem.. in order to create something that’s better.

why not make something better, you know, work smarter not harder, instead of just letting it be. that is the ultimate test. the truth to one’s being. whether or not an individual can and will and does or did.. it all is inconsequential.. because the only thing that matters is what is, and what continues, and what it shall be. That greatest thing, which can define an individual. There is actions, thoughts, will.. creation is more likely.whether or not one will choose to do what they thought they would, and they did..

that greatest thing, that can be found in the individual. there are thoughts.. actions.. desires, which constantly bombard our minds, and yet we often do nothing about many of those thoughts and actions and desires. We just let ourselves forget each of the little things that we at one point in time may have thought would be the greatest idea.

creation is more likely if one will let these thoughts and actions come to fruition.the relationships between 2 and three are mind boggling. There are all kinds of variables.

5:30-close tuesday

wednesday 5-close

thursday 5:30-9

friday 4-close

saturday 530 to close

sunday 530-9

monday off

tuesday 5-close

Officially my first blog on WP. I suppose I should introduce myself.

I am a jack of all trades. Nearly every single thing that I have ever tried, I had the potential to excel at it. I have taken computer programming classes, can type 70-80 WPM, calc, physics, astro-physics, debate, and several AP courses… I am a Junior in college at UNK (Nebraska). I have studied Spanish for 6.5 years, as well as having a spot of experience translating for 6-8 months or so at a factory.

I enjoy using psychotropic drugs. I find that they help me manage my dream states. I spend an unusual amount of time contemplating metaphysics and alternate conceptions of reality. As an example, I had a lucid dream a few weeks ago wherein I took control of my entire universe and I began spontaneously creating instruments out of it, and blasted a grand symphony concerto into the heavens.

I spend an abnormal amount of my time calculating the possibilities of our existence. I have read nearly 2,000 books in my life. I grew up in dire straights. We lived in Anchorage, Alaska. I had 3 older brothers.

My dad was a good man above all else, but a drunk beneath it all. My mom had good intentions, but perhaps didn’t go about everything in the best of means. Long story short, I had a fucked up childhood, but I won’t bore you with the details.

“Think upon that which is good”

If I could sum myself up into a single sentence, it would be this: “Learn to love to learn.”

Because without learning, there is no true growth.

If you like having your mind blown every so often, I guarantee that you will like visiting my page.